Am I Qualified?

Like any person with a job, I am always looking around to see what else is out there...and yes, I know, I should be kissing the ground of this publishing house I work for because I do happen to have a descent job during a pretty bad economical time.

But, I do love carousing mediabistro for the latest and greatest in jobs...but I find it just like my days of jdating. You read a job listing (profile). You get that feeling like wow, this job (guy) may be for me...you want the same things, it is attractive in every way...and then you get to what is usually ONE line that says something that disappoints you. ie: You must have knowledge of the insurance/risk management industry (does anyone even know what that is?) or experience in the food and wine industry is preferred (I eat and drink, a lot, so does that mean I have experience?) If I google insurance/risk management online and read about it, does that mean I have knowledge and can apply? I am, like many people in NYC, in publicity. Whether you are publicising a clothing line, a book, a piece of gum on the sidewalk or a tree, its all the same bull shit.

So, I have just decided that I am going to make these HR folks reading my resume throw me out of the running instead of me just not going for it...let them decide. After all, I'm sure when they were applying for their jobs, it said "Human Resources experience a plus" and they figured they were human and have pretty good resources in their life so why not.

Big City, Small Observations from Las Vegas

Two of my friends and I went to Las Vegas last week for a little girls weekend. I may be the only thirty something women who has never been but I feel much more educated as a result of this trip. I never knew what the big lure was...but I get it now and here are just a few things of what I learned:

• It is a male cheater's paradise. We went to a few clubs only to see many groups of married men getting bottle service and attracting the young ladies with their money and alcohol.


• A or B cups don't cut it in Vegas. If you don't have a C cup or more, you are a novice Vegas player.


• The pool scene looks like it is out of a scene from a 80's spring break movie.


• Never have I felt more brunette and flat in my life...fake blondes and fake boobs everywhere.


• It may be the number one C list celeb spot ever. Our sightings include: Diet Diva (for those of you who watch cable access channels in NY, you know who this is); Carrot Top (perhaps the scariest human being I have ever seen); and this year's Project Runway midget I mean winner Christian Siriano.


• Vegas is to a white trash family as the Hamptons are to an UES New Yorker.


• This is not a spot for a family vacation and the folks that bring their kids to Vegas are really setting them up to be low life sleezes.

I learned much much more but you know the saying, What happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas.

When did Bloomingdales become a Park?

I went shopping at Bloomingdales with a couple of friends yesterday (hello ladies) and we couldn't help but observe the Bloomingdales culture on a Sunday afternoon. Frankly, I don't even know where to begin. I believe this may call for bullets:

• Animals: It is a universally known NY fact that women love to bring their little pooches with them wherever they go...I usually find these women to be a tad annoying (not because of their dogs but because they usually all have some sort of air about them). But at Bloomies yesterday, not only did we witness dogs roaming around on a leash instead of in a cute little carry bag, but these doggies weren't even little. I'm talking Golden Retrievers, German Shepherds...I mean come on. I have enough problems throwing down $400 dollars for a dress but I really don't need a coat of dog hair covering it.


• Eating: One of my friends swears by the frozen yogurt at Forty Carrots on the 7th floor, so while a few of us tried on unmentionables, the other ladies were upstairs buying $5.00 fro yo's. Strangely, the frozen yogurt area is right off of the bedding area...after my lingerie purchases, I headed upstairs to see people lounging on the beds (including my friends and soon to be me.) Bizarro scene. It really could have been the Great Lawn in Central Park on a spring day.


• Dating: My friend T told me her cousin goes to Bloomingdales to pick up women. One could say it's brilliant. A place filled with women, all on the hunt, decked out in their fancy threads and caked on faces...but the reality is, besides T's cousin being a total wanker, is that if a women spots a guy in Bloomingdales, she knows he is there with his wife, girlfriend or mistress so she rather not waste her time eyeing the guy when she can be checking out fabulous 3 inch heels. T's cousin has yet to score a date from the store but he gets an A for trying.

Ballsy New York guys

I've always been amazed by guys in New York and how they have no problem just picking up a girl anywhere. It can be on the subway, at the gym, in the supermarket...it's all fair game if they are interested. I never was like that. In my single days, I might see the same guy for a year at the gym--perhaps taking notice of what days he is there and try and time my workouts accordingly, but I would never say a word, out of fear of rejection (lame, I know, but I was never good at the pick up thing).

Which brings me to my point. Walking to work about a month ago, a guy around my age stopped me to ask me where I was going in such a rush (hi dumb ass, its 9 am on a Tuesday, where do you think I'm going). I said work, he said where, I said the West Village and I started to walk away while he started to ask if I wanted to grab a coffee sometime. It was cold and my gloves were covering my most obvious sign that I am not available so I said, "I'm engaged" and left. Then today, walking the same route, I see this guy. He stops and asks where I am going (he apparently has dementia as well as not being too bright), I again say work and he says, "Well you look absolutely amazing today." All I could think, besides being flattered, was what is the point in wasting your time/breath/effort/pride and all of that on a women who is engaged?

Upper East Side vs. Downtown

I've been a little hard on the UES since I've lived in New York. In the 9 years I have lived in the city,I never saw any reason to go above 34th Street, unless going to Central Park. In a million years, I never would have thought I would be living there. But a year and a half ago, I met the man I am going to marry and he has never lived below 86th Street....and today I find myself living there (and very happy to be there with him). It has taken some time to get used to it but I have found a lot to love about it. First being there is so much outdoor space. To be able to choose which outdoor area I am going to run in on the weekend(Central Park or Carl Schultz Park) is amazing to me. I'm much more used to running through Soho dodging cars and foreign people. I read an article this weekend in The New York Times about how crowded the playgrounds are in the West Village because there are only five acres of open space in a neighborhood with so many families. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/03/30/nyregion/thecity/30playg.html?_r=1&scp=1&sq=west+village+playground&st=nyt&oref=slogin. While we are not up to that stage of life, I do hope to have a child at some point and how nice that I won't have to fight off the nannies on the UES for my kid to have some space to play.

I found myself downtown in the East Village this weekend. We went to a bar 4 blocks from my old apartment on 9th Street. Walking around that area on a Saturday night made me appreciate the UES even more. The streets were crowded and crawling with 22 year olds looking for the next party. I am by no means ready for the burbs but yet I am far from the nights where going from bar to bar is an enjoyable experience. While I still do prefer the downtown food and drink scene (drink scene being after work), the UES pace is closer to where I am at in my early thirties, about to get married. My fiancee and I love going out for a local bite and being able to just sit in the park on a sunny day. Maybe I was scared to move uptown because I saw it as giving up my youth and my edge? Truth is, I'm not a kid anymore...and really, how much edge did I really have for gods sake? I am sure I will never say out loud that uptown is better than downtown but I can say, in my old(er) age, I am appreciating the lifestyle and my new life up there.

Spring in New York

I heart spring in New York! And I especially love working downtown in nice weather. Today I had my first real taste of spring...ok,it's only about 50 degrees today but the sun is shining and there is no wind chill. After getting off the 6 train at Bleeker, I have a nice 10-13 minute walk across Greenwich Village to my office in the W. Village. Such a different vibe downtown...you have your artists, writers, cafe owners all lingering about, drinking their coffee, happy to be alive (or at least they always seem that way.) Everyone is smiling and saying "good morning." Since moving uptown from the E. Village a couple of months ago to live with my fiancee, I often thought it would now be a lot easier for me to work in midtown--but the truth is, I love downtown and would really miss having some part of my life still there--even though my commute is a total bitch. I happen to love all seasons in New York for different reasons but there is something about spring in New York that just makes everyone, including myself, just seem happier.

Fringe bangs rip-off

So last night, I'm leaving work to go meet friends at Bar Stuzzichini for some drinks and apps (worth the random Flatiron location!) and realize my bangs could use a little trim. Short on time this week, I figured I could squeeze in a trim in the hour before going out. There is a hair salon right by my office called Arrojo. I went in...very friendly...no problem...someone could trim my bangs in a moment. They take down my phone number and name. They see me as a potential future customer and I am happy to play the part. I meet my trimmer, sit down...he proceeds to ask who does my color because my hair is "way dry." Two seconds later (literally) I have lovely trimmed fringe bangs. I go to pay and the cashier says $15.00. All I could say was, "Are you serious?"

I've lived in New York for 10 years. High prices don't shock me. I often pay upwards of $100.00 for a haircut and I am by no means cheap. BUT, for a bang trim? With no brush, no wash or blow dry...they couldn't be serious.

Subway etiquette

I don't ask a lot of people that live, work, or visit this fine city of ours...but I do feel that if you do enter the city and use the subways, you should make it your business to follow a few basic rules of etiquette.

• When using the escalators to enter or exit the subway stations...please stand to the right, walk to the left. You as a visitor may have all the time in the world to go visit FAO Schwartz, see a Broadway Show, or hop on a tour bus to go to the West Village to see the street Carrie's Sex and the City apartment is on, but other folks have to get to work.


• Fashionistas: I know your bag is lovely and you spent two whole paychecks to afford it so people think you have money, but does it need it's own seat on the subway?


• Staring: We live in New York. People are interesting. There is a lot to look at...you've got your freaks, hotties, the homeless, models, your stiffs, transgenders, THE WORKS. But take a peak, maybe two, and look away.


• The center pole. Does your whole body really need to lean against it? Ever consider that there may be some other people that may need to hold on for balance?